


But if you need dick, I got you

by Charlotte_Stant



Category: Pod Save America (RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bros helping bros, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-25
Updated: 2018-03-25
Packaged: 2019-04-07 23:01:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14091615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Charlotte_Stant/pseuds/Charlotte_Stant
Summary: “Oh fuck you, Tommy, you're ridiculously attractive and you know it.  You can just do your little smirk thing and people come running to hop on your dick, it’s not like that for all of us.”  Jon is hardcore sullking now, throw pillow clutched in his arms.“Oh, this thing?”  Tommy does the smirk.“Yes!”“Shame it doesn’t work on you or we could fix your not-getting-laid-tonight problem right here.”  There is the faintest glaze of a blush on Tommy’s cheeks and across his nose and he’s resolutely avoiding eye contact.Jon chokes on air.  A little bit, not an embarrassing amount or anything.  He can still breathe.





	But if you need dick, I got you

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place in an AU in which Tommy and Jon do not have any fiancees or long-distance boyfriends. Title from Frank Ocean's Nikes. Keep it secret keep it safe etc. etc.

Tommy is over and they’re lounging on Jon’s couch, laptops out, CNN on the tv on mute. There are the remnants of a pizza on the coffee table and Pundit’s snoozing on her bed in the corner. It’s companionable, it’s nice. They’re mostly quiet, except when—

“Motherfuck” Jon hisses, glaring down at his phone like it’s just told him it’s considering voting for Rubio.

Tommy, with the chill of long practice, doesn’t immediately look up from whatever he’s typing. “Hmm?”

Jon throws his head back and slumps dramatically against the couch. “Oh, nothing, just that my hookup for tonight just asked if I could, quote, ‘bring Favs’ unquote. Which is ridiculous because, A) hookup! And B) you’ve never _met_ him and you’re already Favs-ing him? Really? And C) I thought he liked me for me my dick but it turns out he’s just using me to get to my better-looking friends, which is deeply uncool. So now I’m not getting laid tonight and I’m probably going to die alone and Pundit will have to eat my corpse to survive. Lucky that my people don’t do open casket funerals, I guess. Oh my god, poor Pundit, if she ever realises what she’s done she’ll be heartbroken.”

Tommy, by the end of this speech, has looked up. He blinks consideringly. “Well. That’s a lot.”

“Oh fuck you, Tommy, you’re ridiculously attractive and you know it. You can just do your little smirk thing and people come running to hop on your dick, it’s not like that for all of us.” Jon is hardcore sullking now, throw pillow clutched in his arms.

“Oh, this thing?” Tommy does the smirk.

“Yes!”

“Shame it doesn’t work on you or we could fix your not-getting-laid-tonight problem right here.” There is the faintest glaze of a blush on Tommy’s cheeks and across his nose and he’s resolutely avoiding eye contact.

Jon chokes on air. A little bit, not an embarrassing amount or anything. He can still breathe. “Thomas Frederick Vietor IV, did you just proposition me?”

Tommy is still looking fixedly not at Jon. “You called me ridiculously attractive!”

“Well, yes, but that’s just a fact! That’s like saying, ‘Oh, what a nice sunset,’ it doesn’t mean you want the sunset to sleep with you!”

“Oh. Well. I—misinterpreted, I’m sorry, this is awkward. I’m going to go and—go.” Tommy is bright red now, across his whole face. He fumbles as he packs up his laptop and it falls onto the carpet. Jon has never seen him this flustered in his life.

“Wait, hang on a minute. Just. Um, hang on. Don’t leave, I’ll be right back.”

Jon runs into the kitchen and calls Favs.

“Lovett? What’s up?”

“Hi, I hope you’re not busy, you’re probably having a nice dinner with Emily right now, tell her I say hi, also Tommy propositioned me and I think I want to say yes? Is that a terrible idea, will I be jeopardising our partnership and our future and possibly the future of American democracy itself?” Jon is hunched awkwardly over the sink, kind of whispering kind of not. Chances that Tommy can still hear him are high but Tommy will just have to deal with that.

“Uh. Oh man, I owe Emily twenty bucks. Um, do you want to sleep with Tommy?”

In the background, Jon hears a high pitched squealing. It sounds a lot like “I told you so!” 

He grips his phone more tightly. “Yes, obviously I want to sleep with Tommy, Favs, he is a beautiful man and we share a connection so profound I weep sometimes to think of it, but—wait. Is this a prank? Did you guys set this up as a bit? Because I swear—”

“Lovett. Lo. No, it’s not a prank, c’mon, dude. Look, here are my thoughts: it’s your decision but you clearly want this, so why not give it a shot?”

In the background there is a tinny “wooooooooo!” Jon hangs up and marches back into the living room. Tommy has put his laptop back down and is standing by sofa looking about as awkward as it’s possible for him to look, which is very.

Jon sets his jaw and beckons. “Ok, loverboy, into the bedroom with you. Let’s do this thing.”

 

Tommy looks just as awkward standing by Jon’s bed, which obviously will not do. Jon tackles him, latching on to his chest like a particularly ferocious koala and bearing them both down onto the bed. 

He’s thought about kissing Tommy so many times but actually doing it is heady, incredible. Tommy is a surprisingly filthy kisser, good with his tongue, good with his hands, too, stroking them down Jon’s back, cradling his face. Jon rocks his hips a little and Tommy groans and it’s the hottest fucking thing he’s heard in his life.

Reluctantly, Jon pulls back and sits up, straddling Tommy’s hips. Tommy looks beautiful like this, spread out on Jon’s bed, flushed and breathing hard. His nipples are hard through his t-shirt and Jon reaches out, gently pinches one through the fabric, and oh, Tommy likes that—but focus. Focus! “Ok, so,” Jon says, resisting the urge to find out what happens if he licks his way down Tommy’s chest, “how gay are we getting tonight? What’s your experience level, here?”

Tommy groans again, but not in a sexy way this time, and closes his eyes. “Lovett, will you please shut up and kiss me?”

Jon gently traces a finger down Tommy’s sternum. The way Tommy shivers shouldn’t be allowed, Jon feels like a sex god and they’ve barely done anything. He really doesn’t want to fuck this up. “Tommy.” He enunciates deliberately. “Have - you – ever – slept - with - a – dude - before? I want a straight answer, please. Or a bi answer, oh I crack myself up.”

Tommy opens an eye, and suddenly flips them over so he’s on top and Jon is pinned to the bed, and ok, this is also very nice. “You’re free to keep talking but I’m going to blow you now,” he says, and those words coming out of Tommy’s pretty mouth go directly to Jon’s dick. Tommy’s mouth, which is now is dragging down Jon’s chest, and his hands are working busily at Jon’s waistband and he’s pushing down Jon’s underwear and taking Jon’s dick into his mouth—

“Ok,” Jon gasps a few minutes later, “I concede that that was not your first time at the dick-sucking rodeo.” Tommy looks pink and smug and adorable. “Fuck, the soles of my feet are tingling, is that even a thing? God that was good. I get really talkative after sex, you should know that, I guess it’s probably not a huge surprise, but—oh shit, ‘after sex’, you haven’t come yet, I’m sorry, I’m a monster. What do you want, can I blow you? Or you can fuck me but you have to be on top, I’m too post-orgasmic to ride you right now, sorry.”

Tommy loops an arm around Jon and cuddles him in close. “Um, no, it’s cool. I, um, I already came.”

Jon twists around to stare at him. “Wait, really? You came while you were blowing me?”

Tommy nods and ducks his head, embarrassed.

“No, fuck, Tommy, that’s so hot.” Jon kisses him, because really, how could he not. “That is probably the hottest thing that’s ever happened to me, actually. But next time maybe you can fuck me. Or I can fuck you, people tend to assume I only bottom but actually I am a very gifted top as well. There’s an ‘ass out of you and me’ joke there somewhere, but I’m not searching for it. Oh, hey, we should text Favs! He deserves to know that his bros have achieved coital completion in each others’ arms.”

Tommy laughs silently, his shoulders shaking, and Jon thinks: this is all right. This, this works.


End file.
